Doing the right thing isn't always the easy thing.

I am a firm believer in the power of prayer, and I do not believe in coincidences. I have had many, many "God things" happen to me personally, so I know first hand who is really in charge of my life, and I know (although I can be stubborn about my own will sometimes)everything will always be all right in the end, if I put my faith in Him.

I've put off writing this post for a good long while. For a few reasons. First off, it's about something so close to my heart that, every time I think about it, (let alone speak of it aloud) the waterworks come. A literal flood of tears that I cannot seem to stop. Second, whether I share this or not doesn't really matter, because it is no ones business but my own, anyway. Lastly, some people may not understand why I did what I did.  (I am a people-pleaser by nature, and it weighs heavier than it should on me when I feel I have disappointed anyone, for any reason.)

So.

Moose.

If you have been reading my blog for a while, you know I have moved multiple times in a rather short time period. Each move took me to yet a smaller home, with less windows, and none of them have had yards. (Often how it is when living in a townhouse, duplex, or tri-plex) Working a 40 hour week, then running home for a fifteen minute visit before running back out for several more hours, to run errands, or go out with friends doesn't make for any sort of life for a big yellow dog. Moose was living a life of solitary confinement of sorts.

This weighed heavily on my mind and heart for months. Thirty minutes of quality time a day cannot make up for 23 and a half hours of night-time-sleeping, and sit-around-the-teeny-tiny-living-room-and-watch-the-front-door-for-Tracey-to-finally-come-home.

I confided in friends and family about what to do.Repeatedly. What was best for Moose? This all went on for months. Then, at the end of last summer, after much angst and guilty feelings and endless prayers for guidance, someone told me I should try listing sweet Mr. Moose on Craigslist.

I know.

Unthinkable.

My selfish heart broke at the very thought.

I couldn't do it.

I looked at Moose, laying on the floor at my feet, hoping for a little attention.

I cried.

Hard.

I decided to just look on craigslist to see how many others were out there, trying to re-house their large pups. I typed "Yellow Lab" into the search box on craigslist under Pets.

Here is where God stepped in.

Again.

The second ad down on the page said "Wanted- Mature Yellow Lab". My heart stopped for a second. I felt an oddly peaceful wave come over me, and my stomach knotted up instantly with fear to find out what it said, all at the very same moment.

I took a breath, and opened the ad. I read. A family of three (a couple and their young adult daughter) decided to put an ad on craigslist because they love labs and  found re-homing an older lab really suited them. About eight years ago, after being dog-less for close to a year, they were looking at a pool table at someones house who was moving. They ended up with a pool table and two gorgeous labs. The owner was downsizing and was moving to a house without much room. These labs were about seven years old and were amazing dogs.

They had lost the last of the pair almost a year and half ago to old age. Their family loved them and it took them awhile to be able to think about getting another lab. They weren't really wanting a puppy and would love to give another mature lab a great home for the rest of his life.

The ad had been on craigs for nearly a week, and today was the last day the ad would have been listed. They were not planning to re-post the ad, but rather just see if "it was meant to be".

I wrote to them, asking if they were still looking for a dog. Yes, they were. In fact, they had gotten no responses at all, except mine. (Keep in mind that there were apox. five ads on Craigslist with folks trying to give away or sell their lab.) I asked why they took the route of placing their own ad and not looking at the ads listed for giveaways, and I was surprised to hear that it hadn't ever occurred to them. They just put the ad out there in good faith that the right dog would come their way.

I knew this was meant to be. When I asked how big their yard was, they sent me a picture along with a wonderful detailed email....
Seven acres which (including a Christmas Tree Farm) for Moose to run around and chase birds and squirrels and balls. A Dad that works from home, with a rug by his desk for a dog. I got goosebumps reading about the possible new home for Moose.

(I almost asked if I could move there too.)

We talked on the phone several times, and a week later, we took Moose out to test the waters, and see if he might be happy there. I did a lot of praying about all this that week, asking God for more confirmations that this was what would be best for my sweet Moose.

Any tiny doubt I had about sharing Moose with this wonderful family disappeared the moment we got out of the car and his new Dad showed him where the water bowl was on the front porch.

Thank you, God.

We stayed about an hour and a half, all of us visiting on the back deck, while Moose checked things out and fetched the ball. These caring people said we were welcome to come back to visit Moose. Anytime. Even to take him home for a weekend. Or whatever. They understood just how hard this all was for me.

I knew it was what was best for Moose.

I held it together really well, knowing God had once again worked things out for the good, in his right and perfect time, but when we went to leave, Moose thought he was supposed to get in the car, and he came bounding after us to the car. His new family held him, and told him that, no, he was staying. I disintegrated into a puddle of uncontrolable tears right then, and couldn't look back as we drove off down the road.

That picture up at the top there was taken a few weeks after Moose's move, by the daughter in his new family, (see his unmistakable smile?) and here is a little more recent shot of him doing what he does best...
She later shared with me that Moose seems to like exploring the property. (Although he apparently doesn't like to walk inbetween the christmas trees, he walks around them, which is so typical of fraidy-cat-Moose!)

Not a day goes by that I do not think of Moose, nor a night go by that he is not on my prayer list. My heart trembles ever so slightly, and my eyes always well up a little bit every time I see a big yellow dog. But I am confident, and at peace knowing without a single doubt that it was God's hand that brought the perfect family to me to give Moose what he needed, and deserved, that I could no longer give to him.

I'm not sharing this post to get sympathy, nor do I want to read comments that I am a terrible person and an uncaring pet owner to give up my oh-so-beloved pup. I'm sharing this post with you because I think of you all as friends, and I've never been anything but honest here on this little spot here in  blog-land. I don't plan on changing that.

Comments

[Mary]

What a beautiful and loving story! God works in mysterious ways, and I appreciate that you depend on Him for guidance. I've always loved your stories about Moose, too.

[Brenda]

Tears are streaming down my face as I write this; your story is heartbreaking, but you are right; doing the right thing isn't always the easy thing.

You lovingly made a sacrifice for Moose's well-being, and I know from reading your blog how much you love that dog. That is why you did what you had to do; you did it out of pure love.

I admire you even more. That being said, please stop writing "lil'" instead of "little". That's just annoying:)

[Linda]

You are very brave and very unselfish.

[Cherrie]

There is nothing uncaring about caring for your dog. I have no doubt he will have a happy life and much better, as you already said, than spending time waithing for his beloved human to come home. Well done for caring so much. Cherrie

[Audrey Hansen]

Looks like you found doggy paradise for Moose! You did the right thing, even though it may not feel that way sometimes. I hope he is close enough for you to visit him, at least until he gets used to his new family.

[Judi Bell]

You were so brave!!! We adopted an older lab ourselves. When our Cinder arrived it was love at first sight. Her owners were a mess but wanted her to have a great home to be #1. She was just retired from having pups and they felt it was her time to have ALL the love. It was a very brave thing they did just for the dog..just as you did. They visited every 6-12 months til she passed. Cinder always greeted them with love but was happy with us. I always thought of us sharing her with them.
Way to go Tracy..!!

[kristen ayers]

Tracy, Moose is such a lucky dog to have had you, who cared so much for him....you did the right thing....and, yes, indeed, God orchestrated the whole thing ♥

[Linda Pawlak]

God is smiling down on Moose, and on you, for putting those you love first...just as He did.

[adrienne]

Wow. Great story. Great testimony. I commend you for sharing it. It can't be a testimony of God's faithfulness if you don't share it. I know it's probably still hard every day. You're a great doggie mom!

[Sandie]

A precious story of unselfish love. Isn't it amazing how God works! I know it was hard to share, but I thank you for doing so!

[Keri]

What a great gift you gave Moose!

I had to find my Ernie a home after 8 years. His brother had just passed and he was horribly upset and lonely... I found the sweetest cat lady to love on him... I get updates and pictures regularly (3 yrs later) It was one of the most painful decisions... but one i regret not making sooner...

[Donna]

oh Tracey....what a selfless thing to do. I know how you love Moose and I can imagine the pain you felt at leaving him. You loved him so much you did what was best for him and not what was easy for you.
Now about thinking anyone would leave a bad comment, really? Anyone who has loved a pet would understand how hard it was to give him to a good home. You are right God does have a plan.
Huge hugs,
Donna

[Lisa~A Cottage To Me]

Oh my golly Tracy, I have tears streaming down my face right now! I loved hearing all of your stories about Moose and seeing his pictures on occasion. I wondered where he's been. I know how hard it was for you to have to share him with another family. But, it sounds like he is where he belongs now. What a loving choice you made for your sweet Moose. He knows you did what was best and you can always visit, which is a good thing! Lovely post and Thanks for sharing such a heartfelt post with us!

[Kris H.]

Thank you for doing what was in Moose's best interest. It is NEVER an easy decision, when you love your pets, to rehome. SO thrilled that God opened all the doors and had such agreat home all ready for him!

[sue]

You did the right thing! I know it was hard, but it was the right thing. We had to put our beloved black lab, Beau, to sleep. He was 15 and in pain that couldn't be treated. When you love a pet you do the right thing even if it still makes you cry five years later. Bless you.

[Dotti]

Oh my Tracy, I'm crying my eyes out as my 15-yr old Shih Tzu sleeps beside me. You are such a GOOD person. What a beautiful story of LOVE you've shared. Don't think for a moment that you didn't anything wrong. I'm sure if Moose could say "thank you", he would. He's SO happy. And you did the most loving, thoughtful thing you could do. Yeah Moose!!! He is forever grateful, I"m sure, but I'm sure in his sweet heart, he holds you close. Go visit!

[Linda Brannock]

Thanks for the headache. I always get a headache when I cry. Your lucky dog and lucky you. Thank you for sharing. Love to you.
Linda B.

[Adrienne]

Thank you for taking a risk to share your deeply personal story of God's leading in your (and Moose's) life. Yes, this was definitely orchestrated by God. You are a caring, loving person and you chose the best for someone you loved dearly. Hugs to you for doing what your heart told you was right! So happy for Moose and his new space!
Hugs,
~Adrienne~

[Candy]

Tracey, I know. God answered prayer for me with our crazy kitty a few years ago. We were moving to Austin, had to find a good home for our lovely kitty. Prayers to find a home,and nothing seemed to happen. Moving day loomed, and I was forced to drive to the animal shelter crying, because I knew this meant she probably wouldnt be adopted. As I drove into the parking lot,I noticed a woman and girl standing at the door. I rolled down the window, and asked her if the shelter was still open. She said no, it closed 15 minutes ago, and the woman was upset because she had promised her daughter a cat for the little girls birthday! They did not have much money and mom was hoping they could adopt one fairly cheaply. How about free!???? I had goose bumps as I drove away crying, realizing how God wants to be involved in even the smallest parts of our lives, and if we will just turn to Him, He always comes thru! Thanks for reminding me today thru your post how Great our God is!
Candy

[christine]

Tears... joy, sympathy, empathy, and happiness for all of you.

[Raylene]

My heart breaks for you...but you did right by Moose. God is great and you were listening! I cannot imagine having to leave my Maggie with another family..what an unselfish thing you did. God bless you, Moose and his new family. Thanks for this post...I needed a good cry.

[lori hilleboe]

I had been wondering about Mr Moose, had hoped he hadn't been ill or such.
You gave a family who loves him & Moose room to spread out and lots of scents to hunt.
Never easy and always sad.
Hugs,
Lori in AZ

[Jan R]

I have also been wondering about Moose. My husband and I LOVE labs.... we had to put our wonderful 13 year lab down when she had cancer. Swore to never again get another..... 3 months later we brought home our new lab puppy, Macy Jane. I cried when I read your post but what you did was in the best interest for Moose. It sounds like he is being loved and spoiled. Things like this are never easy but with your busy life it was the best solution. God Bless Mr. Moose and may he lead a wonderful life!

Jan R

[Tracy]

I have been in your place at one time as well. I had a 4 month old dog with lots of energy and big and my kids loved him. He was promised with a move to a new town. Well then my husband passed away suddenly and I just could not imagine trying to train the dog, at the time just seemed like I had to find the right home for him and I did. Sometimes we get updates and I do not regret my decision. Fast forward almost 7 yrs. later and we now have chickens, a rabbit and a small dog. You do what you have to do and what is right for you at that time of life. Everything is for a reason.

[Joanne B.]

Oh, my heart is breaking for you! You did the right thing! As I started reading I thought that you were goign to tell us you had to ahve him out down for a newly diagnosed problem, so I was relieved that Moose is still here and somehow, knowing he was happy somewhere else, was better than him just being a memory. You DID do the right thing- you blessed another family with what you know was so special to you ! It was the ultimate in sharing! To us dog people, it is no less than a kidney and while that may sound funny, it is not...

[Dori]

Tracey dear, you had sweet Moose in your life when you truly needed him to love and comfort you. And now you are returning his gift to him, in the form of a loving, caring for the rest of his life home. For animal lovers it doesn't get much better than this. Blessings to you. Take a deep breath. You'll both be fine. {gentle hug}

[colleen]

omgosh how could anyone think you are a bad person. we adopted a yellow pup early Feb this yr she is our 2nd lab they are the best. but we live in the forest with a huge fenced back yard, and a 5 yr old german shorthair to show her the way. Also my husband retired a few days before we brought Bonnie home.It is truely like cutting off your arm to give up a beloved family member. what a lucky Moose you truely made the right choice. bless you

[Rachelle S]

I cried for you! Writing this with tears in my eyes as I can whole-heartedly understand. It sounds like you found a Perfect Fit for Moose and I'm so glad that he's found his Farm home : ) (((hugs)))

[Peggy Mossing]

What a good heart you have! Moose looks so happy and I know he has brought so much joy to his new family.

God Bless.

[Carol]

What a genuine and wonderful person you are! I am in awe of your strength. Moose does look happy...and I am sure that there is a special place in his heart reserved just for YOU!
God bless you both!

[Missy]

Oh Tracey. My heart goes out to you. Such a hard decision. Bless you and sweet, sweet Moose!!!!!

[joyce]

This is a beautiful story, and it sounds like it was truly meant to be....for you, and the family, and for Moose. I know how hard that must have been for you, but sometimes doing the right thing is awfully hard. I'm so glad you get to visit him whenever you please. That should be wonderful for both of you!

[Barbra]

Dear Tracey, such a lengthy time since I have written you. Dear Moose filled many a page of your blogging stories 'along the way' and tonight's tender words revealed fully the great devotion you have for your beautiful friend. The most difficult decision was answered with your unselfish love...how God orchestrated the answer was the soft place where your prayer was answered Tracey, that little family's prayer was answered and I think that Moose's smile is the cord that ties all that loving evermore together......

I just have to think Tracey that God has a lovely sense of humour making sure that Moose would be surrounded by the very thing that delights a puppy - his very own forest of trees. This was a true love story that you shared with we readers tonight Tracey.

God Bless,
Barbra.

[Tracey, mom of two Labs]

No question...you did the right thing. Good Mom!

[Annette Tracy]

Oh Tracey, this brought tears to my eyes! I know how difficult it must have been. I just have to put down my 17 yo cat, and it is so difficult to lose them. Yes, God certainly orchestrated the new family for you. It just couldn't have been more perfect. Thank you for sharing this w/us.

[Victoria Lynn]

What a wonderful thing for you to share with us. I admire you for being such a caring pet owner and putting his needs before your own. So sweet and loving, you are a good owner! May God bless your hurting heart and bless you for sharing your testimony with others!
Hugs, Victoria Lynn

[Lauralee...proudly owned by 2 labs and 4 cats]

I'm sobbing right now ~ I cannot imagine the grief you must feel to not have your sweet baby. That being said, YOU DID THE RIGHT THING! Many times the right thing is not the EASY THING and it hurts. It would break my heart to not have our Labs and kitties with us ~ we love them so dearly, BUT if need be, to give them the best life possible I would be willing to find them the best home possible. Moose has a great new family to love and serve and you have peace in your heart knowing you did the best thing for him. Bless you!

[Patty]

Let's get some perspective here, folks. Moose is a DOG (not a child) and needed a different home for his own well being. i am sure he is missed, but this is not a tragedy (no less than a kidney? Please. Have you had to give up a kidney?) The dog is probably happier where he is since he can roam around and do dog things.

[Lisa]

You are so right about it sometimes being hard to do the "right thing". I have experienced the deep pet-love-connection with a golden retriever understand just how difficult this decision was for you. I applaud you in putting the well being of Moose above your own human sentiment! He is experiencing a little bit of Heaven on Earth at his new home. What a place!

[Tracy]

I cried thru the entire story. Our lives have paralleled on so many levels and I too, after losing my home recently had to place my yorkie and two cats as they could not come with to the new "room" I had rented. Luckily, I found incredible homes for them even tho all 3 went to separate places. I can visit anytime and still receive pics and updates. I know how you feel. You did the right thing. Not only have you and I experienced so many of the same trials these last few years (that's why I love your blog)....we also share the same name!

Hugs,

Tracy

[Jeannie McGehee]

I think this is one of the bravest decisions you will ever have to make..what a beautiful story of love and dedication towards your beloved dog but also about our God who truly does what is best for us...Our God always does what is good and always provides the best and from the pictures, God provided the best home for Moose..what a neat story and a day brightner! As one who is new to the blogging world, I appreciate all the stories of everyday living--good or bad--and how we can encourage each other...Thank you!

[Gloria]

I love happy endings.

Gloria in Virginia

[vicki]

So glad to hear Moose is still with us! Since you haven't mentioned him ,or posted pictures in quite awhile I was afraid someting happened to him. What a brave selfless decision you made.
Vicki in Cape Vincent

[Kathleen]

We took in a Lab in January. He showed up on our covered porch at one of the coldest streaks this winter. I ran an ad in the paper and we took him to all the local vets to see if they knew who his owners were. Nobody claimed him so he joined our family of four cats and a cockatiel, all strays. The vet says he is probably about six years old, he is very well behaved, well trained, loves car rides and walks in the park. Our one little cat has really taken a liking to him and he gives her nice big kisses. He has brought so much joy to our lives and keeps us entertained with his antics.
I don't know his history or where he came from but I know his future is bright. You did the right thing. I'm sure Moose and his new family are very happy.

[Kathy]

This is so funny you posted this today. I had been thinking I missed hearing about Moose. I know this was a heart breaking decision. Your right Moose was used to a different life and spending so much time alone wasn't good for him. You did the right thing. Years ago I had to do the same thing for my dog Rags. I still feel so bad even though I know it was the right thing to do. It looks like you and Moose have been through some rough times and now your BOTH happy in your new worlds. Doing the right thing is often the most painful. This does look like doggie heaven though.

Best,
Kathy

[Jeni]

Tracey thank you for sharing your unselfish love for Moose and the glory of God answering your prayer...what a true testament to him. I cried as I read your posting as I know how very hard this was as we had to find a new home for our beloved Irish Setter. You are a sweet and caring person to put Moose's needs and well being above your own feelings...you blessed him and his new family and God chose the perfect new home for him to go to!

[Tracey]

Sweet Sweet Moose......I know how much you love him! He was there for you thick and and Thin!

The Other Tracey

[Karla]

I'm sorry I Just can't pretend to think this was touching or self less. A decision like this can be about what is best for the dog. It can be made with heartache and tears. But I do think it is also a decision made of convenience. And I am dissapointed. A dog is a committment. And its too bad people give up on honoring those committments. you had a choice. One you could have made much sooner, if it was done out of concern for Moose. But while you were on your own, no career, no b-friend, you needed Moose. He was there for you. It seems since you've started your new career, are no longer alone, Moose is no longer some'thing' you need. So now you think of what's in his best interest. Really? Sorry to be a downer, sorry you don't want differing opinions on your blog comments (I get that, it is your blog). I have so enJoyed your blog and have been sincerely happy with the positive changes life has brought your way. But I can't deny how disappointed I feel with this. Similar to your decision to move in with your b-friend without marrying him. Makes no difference to me. I have no Judgement regarding cohabitating without marriage. That's not my point regarding this. Whatever works for people, love is love, with or without a marriage license. But, as in your decision re Moose...at one time it seemed a big issue for you. you seemed proud or committed to yuor values (even climbing on a soapbox occasionally, good for you! ). But as your needs and desires changed, you seemed to throw your values out the window, in an attempt to Justify what you wanted in that moment. your decision with Moose...seems similar. Sad to see people unable/willing to stand by their convictions when its no longer easy for them to do so. Or convenient. I believe the term I've heard used for this is hypocritical, and I hate to think of someone I've respected this way. I take no pleasure in writing this, truly I don't. But my convictions guide me, even when it's uncomfortable and difficult for me, so I feel the need to tell you how I feel. At least Moose is with folks who want him and hopefully will committ to him. Sorry for the tirade. It wasn't intended to be hateful and I sincerely wish you the

[Laurie]

Tracey, you absolutely did the right thing! Dogs are pack animals and his "pack" (you) wasn't able to give him the time he needed. Labs are such soulful dogs and I'm sure he has missed you (as you have deeply missed him) but he now has a new life with lots of land to explore and people who has the quantity of time unfortunately didn't. When I put my labby girl down due to cancer, I made the decision when I saw the first signs of her going down hill. As hard as it was, it was difficult to deal with the people who didn't understand why I did it. Daisy gave us 9 wonderful years. I couldn't bear the thought of her being uncomfortable (she was also going blind because of the disease). I bawled my head off at the vet's office and his assistant kept reassuring me, you're doing the right thing. Rest assured, you did the right thing.

Laurie

[Dawn]

"you had a choice. One you could have made much sooner, if it was done out of concern for Moose. But while you were on your own, no career, no b-friend, you needed Moose. He was there for you. It seems since you've started your new career, are no longer alone, Moose is no longer some'thing' you need. So now you think of what's in his best interest. Really?"

My sentiments, exactly.